LttP: Devil May not be able to Play Correctly

While the internet is presently gushing over Bayonetta, it dawned on me that I’ve not actually played Devil May Cry in any of its prior forms, outside of a demo of the okay DMC4. This is probably something I should have fixed and was quite very much intending to do. Thankfully, a friend had a copy of the PC port of DMC3, which I’ve heard is the best in the series, and I finally have a computer capable of running things that came out after 2005. So, what are my LttP thoughts on what is supposed to be one of the finest action games of last generation?

Well, I’m sorry to say that I can’t deliver on them when I’d like. Why do you ask?

Oh, that's why

Devil May Cry 3 is really not a game that can be played with a keyboard and mouse. I’m sure somebody out there will probably read this, stroke the scruff on his neck, and scoff that he played it perfectly fine with one. No, this is not perfectly fine. Its awkward. In fact, it’s so awkward the only way the experience of playing the game could be any more awkward is if Dante was played by Micheal Cera.

So, you are probably now thinking, “Well if it can’t be played with a keyboard all that well, use a gamepad! You’ve written about 360 games, surely you can use a 360 controller.” Well, the game apparently doesn’t support it, or at least in any manner capable of playing.

Ubisoft ported Devil May Cry 3 to the PC in the middle of 2006. Two Thousand and Six In the Year of Our Lord A Fucking D. The 360 was released in November of 2005. By the end of release weekend alone, the 360 sold enough to make it to where its standard USB controller was instantly one of the most available computer compatable USB controllers on the market, not to mention in homes. Seriously, the minute the 360 was released, any and all PC developers with brain one should have known that they needed to support it, even more so when porting console games that practically require a console-styled controller. Ubisoft apparently doesn’t have brain one. The 360 controller, along with what is apparently a long list of other controllers, wasn’t supported at release. Ubisoft’s idea of fixing it was to release a patch that included a controller config tool. Of course, Ubisoft is so incompetent that the tool doesn’t actually recognize the 360 controller.

The patch actually does allow the game to recognize the 360 pad. However, the catch is that the analog sticks are reversed, making the right stick move Dante and the left stick control the camera. I take back what I said before, this is more awkward than playing it with a keyboard while Micheal Cera kills demons.

So, in the spirit of wanting to at least see where Bayonetta’s origins lie, in the hopes that it clicks better for me, I’ll attempt to press on with the terrible keyboard controls. I’m just going to use this as further justification to shy away from Ubisoft.


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